White Rabbit
by PolarisRain
Summary: THE LONG AWAITED SEQUEL TO RAMUNE! It's been almost a year since the 1st story ended. What has become of Honda, Otogi, Kaiba, and the others? How everyone has been able to cope and after a year of darkness, new light shines through. HxO, HxK, various.
1. Self

White Rabbit

Written by: Rain (PolarisRain)

Rated: M

Genre: Romance x Drama

Warnings: Yaoi, citrus, language.

Pairings: Honda x Otogi, Kaiba x Honda

Notes: The long awaited sequel to Ramune! I know, a bunch of you have been looking forward to it for quite some time now. I've even taken the time to email many of my fans about the debut since I'm sure many of you have forgotten about it. Do not fret. I almost did too. However, a promise is a promise, so here it is!

Also, Carrying on with the Japanese treat themed titles, White Rabbit is a creamy rice candy, I believe. I just enjoy using White Rabbit because it comes with that whole Alice, "Down the Rabbit hole", kinda of vibe. Anyways, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-gi-oh or the candy, White Rabbit.

Chapter One: Self

It was a Thursday when Honda Hiroto opened his eyes in his studio apartment on the outskirts of Tokyo. His brow knit together, eyes squinting to find solace from the harsh rays of the morning sun. Through the brilliance, he could make out a moving silhouette on the other side of the divider that separated the bed from the rest of the flat.

He covered his face with a heavy hand. A cool sensation hit a small spot of his forehead. Honda didn't have to open his eyes to know what it was. It was the weight of the world, held up by his right ring finger in the form of a silver ring with a band of emeralds. Rolling over, Honda groaned to make it known that he was awake.

The silhouette stopped its motions. A pause in time. Then, a soft voice, "Good morning, Hiroto."

" 'Mornin." mumbled Honda. He removed his hand from his face to see that the silhouette formed into Otogi Ryuuji at his bedside. There was a steaming mug wrapped in both of his hands and a small smile tugging at his lips. Honda sat up and accepted the mug, "You're up late." he noted. The clock was displaying ten after eleven.

Otogi shrugged, "We don't get to spend many mornings together. I usually leave early in the morning to catch the train back to Domino. Sometimes, it's nice to sleep in." he smirked, "You make the cutest faces when you sleep."

"Meh." was the only retort Honda could muster. He sipped the coffee that Otogi had made him. Tea wasn't commonly had in the apartment. No. Tea was for children. Adults run on coffee. Honda took another swallow of coffee and watched Otogi pull out an outfit to wear. He hadn't seen Otogi when the sun was up in quite some time. He wasn't sure if it the coffee burning his insides or if it was guilt. Otogi has to wake before the crack of dawn to get to his game shop in Domino on time for work. He doesn't act as if he minds it, but deep down, Honda knows that Otogi resents him.

_I'm so selfish._

It's been nearly a year since Honda had asked Otogi to pack his things and run away with him. That same day had started with Honda waking in a bed that belonged to the game making millionaire, Seto Kaiba. The man that had stolen Honda's heart and has not given it back.

Honda didn't want it back. Having a heart meant having feeling again. He was perfectly content with his life of numbed out emotions. He had a new job, a new home, and a new life. He didn't have to fret about obligations or expectations. He certainly didn't need anyone. Anybody except Otogi. Without him, Honda wouldn't be alive. Otogi, for the time being, was his heart.

"Are you going to get out of bed sometime today, Hiroto?" asked Otogi as he stripped from his pajamas, "Just because we're not working today doesn't mean we can be lazy!"

"Says who?" Honda asked, putting his mug down on a bedside table. He reached over and grabbed the other man by the hips. With a grunt, he pulled him back into the bed, "Since when do we have to be productive members of society? It's a Saturday!"

Otogi giggled and defended himself with a pillow to Honda's face. He tugged a piece of his ebony colored hair behind his ear, "It's beautiful outside, Hiroto. Don't you want to go see Tokyo? We've been here for ages and we've never taken the time to see the city. It's the capital for crying out loud!"

"I see Tokyo everyday. I deliver flowers!" Honda poked Otogi's nose lightly, "What's out there besides crowds, dirt, and urban decay?" he looked out the window. Their magnificent view from the second floor was merely an apartment above fruit market. There was a thin strip of blue above it that could be seen out the window. It was nothing like Domino. In Domino, he could see the sky from almost anywhere he was. He never felt so disconnected from the heavens. He was so out of reach, just like him...

Otogi frowned, cupping Honda's face in his hand, "Hiroto. Where did you go?"

Honda blinked and looked down at him. Brilliant green eyes shined in the morning light. A corner of his mouth went up, "Sorry." he said and kissed Otogi's forehead, "If you want to go see Tokyo, we can go see Tokyo."

"Actually..." Otogi bit his lip, "I was thinking we could take more of an overnight trip." he suddenly ended his gaze. His eyes were now darting around all the corners of the room.

"Otogi, we can't afford something like that. Where would we stay?"

"Well, okay. Just hear me out." Otogi pleaded as he put his hands up, "I've been talking to Ryou..."

Domino. Drama. Death. Don't.

"No way." Honda said, climbing out of the bed with twice the speed he had before. He immediately yanked open a drawer of his dresser in search for pants.

A small voice. "Hiroto..."

"I said no!" Honda wheeled around and glared. He broke it only to pull a shirt over his head.

"Please, Honda!" Otogi cried, getting up and approaching the other man, "I think it's time we go back. We need to put this all behind us! You need to get back to school. It's your last year. You have so much potential and you're just wasting it by hiding!"

"Do you think that _he_ didn't have potential?" he didn't dare say _his_ name. It was too painful, "What about me makes _me_ deserve such a privilege to be successful? What did _I_ do?"

"You don't mean that." Otogi said, "Honda, listen to yourself. You're being ridiculous! I'm not asking you to move mountains! Everyone is worried about you. You won't talk to anyone. You don't leave the house unless you have to work. We've lived here for nearly a year and you've made no friends. I have to plead with you to eat. When will it end?"

Honda was chewing the inside of his cheek. A coppery taste hit his tongue and still he kept going. He recalled his last embrace with his mother, promising a safe return before school began. Even before that, he had pinky promised with Mokuba that he would be home soon. The pile of promises that he wasn't keeping was only growing as time goes on.

"I just want you to come home." Otogi says quietly. There was no anger in his voice. Instead he clutched Honda's arm, "Please, Hiroto. This has gone on for far too long." he begins to shake, burying his face in his hands, "This is all my fault. I shouldn't have run off with you..."

Honda knew it. He knew all along that Otogi had never wanted to come. He hated Honda. He regrets ever coming. Honda stomped across the apartment and shoved his feet into his sneakers. He grabbed his keys off the counter and headed for the door. "HIROTO! WAIT!" he heard, but did not heed as he slammed the door to the apartment behind him. He didn't expect Otogi to be there when he returned.

x-x-x

There was nowhere else in the giant capitol to go except the small flower shop that Honda worked at. He weaved through the Tokyo traffic and parked his motorcycle with a screech. The squeal attracted a little attention. Enough for the flower shop's owner to stepped outside. The elder man that went simply by "Sei" gave Honda a puzzled look, "What brings you here on a Saturday, Honda? Shouldn't you be enjoying your day off? You'll get burnt out if you work too hard."

The sound also called for the elder's granddaughter, Midori, to poke her mousy head out from inside, "Oh! H-hello, Honda-san." she came outside fully and bowed low, "What a surprise!" she giggled nervously.

Honda nodded at her, "Hey, Midori." he was not naïve and knew that the girl had a crush on him. He simply pretended not to notice. A cruel choice, but he didn't have the energy for games and certainly didn't care to look for another place of employment. He bowed at Sei, "I'm sorry to trouble you on the one day a week you like to be rid of me." he smirked, "I was out for a ride and was in the area. I thought I'd visit."

Sei smiled, "You are always welcome here, Honda." he looked over his shoulder at his granddaughter, "Midori, prepare something to eat. I think it's near lunch time."

"Yes, Papa." she obediently went back inside to make lunch before Honda could object.

With a kind arm around Honda's shoulders, Sei lead him inside the flower shop toward the back where the stairs to their home resided. As he climbed the steps, Honda's worries of Otogi being at the apartment when he returned disappeared.

Lunch at the flower shop wasn't a normal custom for Honda. In actuality, he rarely ate lunch at all. Midori was an excellent cook. Not to say that Otogi wasn't. It had been such a long time since Honda had had homemade food made by a woman. To him, there were some things that men simply couldn't do as well as as women.

As Honda waved goodbye from his bike, the sinking feeling in his stomach returned. He had distracted his mind for a mere two hours. There was nothing else to numb him any longer. Honda decided it was time to return back. He wasn't gaining much by running away from Otogi.

In reality, what had he gained from running from home? His mother must be worried sick. He hadn't called in months. He was sure that she believed he was dead. _What a relieving idea_, Honda thought, _to leave this agony._

There has been nothing but his own drowning in a pool of despair. Day in and day out, Honda had not grown into the man he dreamed he would. He wasn't a man at all. He was shadow of what he could be. Otogi was right. He had the potential to do better. So, why couldn't he get out of bed some days?

_Why does my body hurt when I've been taking it easy all day? Even when I blink, my eyes can't stop burning like they've been open for weeks. There's constant white noise going in my head, a static fuzz I can't shut off like a busted tv and I can't change the channel._

Honda put his feet down on the street as he idles at a stop light. He looked up at the sky. Clouds had formed and the city had turned gray. There was a chill. Winter was trying to sneak up on everyone one last time. Though Honda knew winter had died weeks ago. It was mid spring. It was almost time for a year to completely pass by. Only another few short weeks since that terrible day that he had to wish his best friend goodbye...

Taking one more corner, Honda could see his apartment approaching. He imagined Otogi would still be there, curled up on the couch trying to sort out his thoughts. Honda's guilt was getting the best of him once more. He didn't want to trouble Otogi. Rarely did they fight. This was actually the first time he had ever mentioned going back to Domino with Honda. Honda was sure that he had to have grown some pretty large ones to even begin to conversation and he just shot him down and left him to bleed all over the rough hardwood.

The whole concept terrified him. Even as he parked his bike and removed his helmet, he could feel a tremble take over his body. As he went upstairs and stuck his key into the lock, he still didn't know what his decision would be.

He pushed the door open lightly. Remaining in the doorway, he called out, "...Otogi?"

There was a sniffle from the bed. Honda went to investigate and saw a pile of blankets. He asked again, "Otogi?"

The mound began to shake and Otogi's eyes peered out from under the covers. They reminded Honda of Christmas, the green of his pupils matching with the red that had been caused from crying. Otogi hiccuped, "I didn't think you'd come back." Otogi sat up and removed the blankets to expose that he hadn't gotten dressed or much of anything else since Honda had left.

"I'm sorry." Honda said and he sat beside Otogi and pet his hair, "I didn't mean to take off like that."

Otogi collapsed into Honda's chest, trying his hardest not to start crying once more, "I was so scared!" he clung to Honda's shirt, dampening it with the tears he couldn't hold, "Don't you ever do that to me again! You can't just leave me!"

Honda held Otogi tightly, continuing to hold his head with his hand. He chanted, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." as if the other could not hear him.

"I didn't mean what I said!" Otogi kept ranting, "I mean, I want you to be happy and I don't know what I can do anymore! I- I need help! I'm sorry I'm not enough for you! When I said that I shouldn't have come with you, I meant I shouldn't have let you leave in the first place. I let you run from your problems. What kind of friend leaves their friend to wallow in denial? I'm such a terrible person! I'm so sorry, Honda! I'M SORRY!"

Never did Honda expect what he was hearing. Is that truly how Otogi felt? After all he had done for him? Honda couldn't forget the day he stumbled to Otogi's. He was soaked through the skin from the rain and passed out from starvation. Since then, Otogi has done nothing but watched over him, fed him, and supported every decision he made. How could he feel so useless?

"Otogi..." Honda cooed, pushing Otogi up from his chest to look him in the face. He used his shirt to wipe the tears from his face, "Are you serious? You're the best thing I could have asked for. You've been nothing but loyal. I couldn't never find someone like you." he kissed his forehead, "I'm sorry I make you feel so small. I'm so selfish." he sighed, "I make you leave everything behind to come to Tokyo and for what?" he laughed darkly, "So you could spend the most of your days commuting and then coming home to a loser like me? _You're _the one with so much potential. I'm sorry I'm making you waste it by being here." he took a deep breath, "I want you to go home."

"I'm not going without you." was Otogi's immediate response, "We're in this together, through and through. I'm not leaving you here." he tried his best smile, "Besides, whose going to cook for you and do your laundry?"

Honda snorted, "I'd manage."

"Sure thing. That's why the only load you did could fit Yugi, it shrunk so much!" Otogi kissed Honda's cheek, "I love you."

Honda returned the kiss and stretched his body out on the bed, "You too." he could never find it in him to say it back. It wasn't because he didn't, because he cared more deeply for Otogi than anyone he knew, but there was something about that phrase that he couldn't get past.

_I love you._ Honda recalled the heavy breath on his skin, creating a patch of goosebumps where it had touched. That one night he had nearly a year ago. His last night in Domino City.

Otogi had disappeared off to the bathroom to wash up while Honda pulled boxes out of storage. When Otogi reappeared, he paused in the doorway of the bathroom, "... Hiroto?"

"I meant it when I said I wanted you to go home." Honda stated as he begun to throw Otogi's clothes into a box.

"W-wait!" Otogi said, running over to Honda and grabbing the clothes, "I said I wasn't going without you!"

"You're not." Honda said, making sure he locked eyes with Otogi as he said it, "You deserved to be back home and if me going means you going, then I'll go." he sighed, "It's not going to be easy, but..." he smiled warmly, "We've been through this much, right?"

Otogi beamed, "Well then, let me help with this." he took the clothes that were in his arms and tossed them into the box. The two men shared a laugh and a kiss. "I'm so proud of you, Hiroto."

"Thanks." he replied, continuing to pack, "I'm terrified."

"I know. Me too, but I spoke to Ryou. He and his yami offered the guest room until we get settled. I think it's a good idea."

"We can afford our own place when we get there..." Honda stated. There was silence on the other end. Honda turned to see that Otogi was clutching a green button up shirt a little too tightly. He recognized it at once, "...Where did you get that?" It must have been buried in the drawer.

Otogi took a deep breath before folding it nicely and placing it on the bed, "I think moving in with Ryou would be a good idea." he repeated.

Honda put down a pair of jeans and wrapped his arms around Otogi from behind, resting a head on Otogi's shoulder, "Okay."

_I'm so selfish._

Honda had always been so caught up in what he's been doing and feeling. He lashes out so irrationally, that he never once considered the distress that Otogi must endure. The constant reminders that the owner of that green shirt is no longer around to wear it. If Honda hurts so much, Otogi must also undergo such terrible pain. Honda constantly forgets. _I'm so stupid._

"You don't always have to be so strong, Otogi." he said.

"Yes I do."

Ryou and Yami Bakura have been out of contact with Honda for so long. Yet, Honda can still recall the gentle smile of Ryou, his delicate scent of vanilla with a dash of cinnamon. He remembers sharing a cigarette with Bakura in Anzu's back yard. He wonders if the two ever allowed each other to fall in love.

Honda lets go of Otogi with one last kiss on the shoulder. As he steps away he also ponders how much longer it will take for him to allow himself to fall in love.

x-x-x

A/N: There it is! The long awaited Chapter One to the sequel of Ramune! Please let me know if you're as excited as I am! Also, I welcome criticism and new fans. Thanks and see you at chapter two! xox


	2. Two Steps

Chapter Two: Two Steps

It didn't truly hit Honda until he was in the passenger side of a small truck with all of his possessions that he had agreed to move back to Domino. As Otogi turned the key in the ignition, the truck roared. Honda felt his heart soar up into his throat. He swallowed hard and choked out, "I can't do this."

Otogi answered in a soft tone, "You can." He turned onto the narrow street and merged into the flow of Tokyo traffic.

Honda bit his lip and tightened the grip on the bento box that rested in his lap. He had gone to the flower shop to say goodbye to Sei and Midori. Teary-eyed, Midori threw together some lunches for him and Otogi. In exchange, Honda had embraced her and expressed his thanks for all that her and the old man had done for him. They invited him back anytime if he wanted to visit. Honda was sure it would be the last time he'd ever see them.

The drive back was nearly silent. With every mile, Honda felt more and more nauseous. Otogi kept encouraging him to eat Midori's bento, but Honda would refuse. Instead, he kept the window rolled down in case the last meal he ate wanted to come back up.

Domino City. Honda had never been more scared of anything in his life. It sounded so ominous. A world that he had left behind was suddenly latching onto his back and he couldn't shake it. He wouldn't, anymore. At least, that's what he wanted to believe.

The sun was setting when Otogi hit the town line. Honda's saw the towers and hustle that he had grown up with, but, for some reason, he felt like he'd never been there before.

"Welcome home." Otogi said, still speaking in quiet exhales. Honda knew it wasn't going to be the last time he heard that phrase. Or at least, he hoped he was welcome. 

After having them lodged in his throat for the better part of a day, Honda finally leaned out of the window and vomited what felt like his heart and stomach onto the street. Otogi pulled over the truck to let Honda catch his breath. He rubbed Honda's back and took the bottled water that was in the cup holder. When Honda sat up, he leaned into the seat, resting his head back. Otogi handed him the water bottle. "Thanks." Honda murmured with his eyes shut. He then proceeded to use the water to rinse out his mouth.

Otogi said in a near whisper, "We need to find a way to lower your stress levels." he suggested, "Maybe some anxiety medication."

"No, I'm fine." his voice shaking, but his tone was firm. Otogi restarted the car and they continued into the heart of the city.

They drove down Main street as if they did it on a daily basis. Honda remembers taking his bike and skidding around the corners of the downtown plazas and parking right in front of the arcade. He hadn't been to the arcade in such a long time. Honda was never very good at video games anyways. More times than not, he'd let his opponent win because he didn't care to win as much as they did.

Otogi didn't flinch when they passed the street he used to live on. Honda remembers stumbling up the hill in the pouring rain. His body collapsed against the door and he hit the ground, blacking out from the sight of his best friend and the one he wanted most becoming one before his eyes. It was that day that Honda had no one to turn to and nowhere else to go. That day, Otogi had welcomed him into his home and entered into the downward spiral that was Honda's life.

Though, Honda realizes, Otogi has always been there for him. Through all of the terrible things they kept happening to him, Honda was always able to stand up again because Otogi was there taking care of him. As they waited at the red light, Honda placed his hand on Otogi's thigh. A gesture that made Otogi turn his head toward Honda, "You okay?"

"Yeah." Honda replied sincerely. He had a small smile on his lips and a shine in his eyes.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Otogi asked, going through the intersection.

"Like how?"

"Like you... never mind." He shook his head and continued farther down the road. They reached a little neighborhood with quintessential suburban houses. They pulled in front of what they both already knew was the Bakura residence.

Honda imagined Ryou looking out the window impatiently, fingers to his mouth as he gnaws on his petite nails. Instead, he was pleasantly surprised to find that Ryou was watering the green stalks that was popping out of the small flower bed in the front of the house. Honda knew them to be daises when they were in bloom.

Ryou Bakura dropped the hose in surprise, having not noticed the truck pulling up. "Oh!" he exclaimed and immediately ran over to shut off the water. Honda snorted and chuckled lightly. It felt so refreshing.

When Ryou returned, Otogi was already out of the truck and opening the back. "Hello!" he said with the brightest of smiles, "How was the drive?"

"Exhausting." Replied Otogi, grunting as he lifted a box out.

At this point, Honda had finally emerged from the car. He stuffed one hand in his pocket nervously, looking at the quiet empty street, the elderly couple's blue house next door, the bird that was perched on the telephone wire, and anywhere else that wasn't Ryou.

"_I think I'm in love with you!"_

In his large winter sweater and his eyes dripping hot tears, Ryou had admitted his crush to Honda on a cold night last year. Completely taken aback, Honda had rejected Ryou and their friendship had yet to truly recover from it. So, now, as Honda kicked pebbles by his feet, he didn't know what his next move should be.

Ryou could sense the awkward air. He turned to face Honda and smiled wide, "Honda, I am so happy to see you!" he wrapped his arms around Honda's broad but frail shoulders. With a sigh of relief, Honda held Ryou and said, "Hey Ryou. You look great." he gave him a warm smile as they broke apart.

"Mmm." Ryou's cheeks flushed and he lowered his eyes, "Thank you." he nodded his head towards the house, "Bakura is out back."

Honda nodded and ventured up to the front door of the house. He instinctively skipped every other step and let himself in. He kicked off his shoes. The foyer that used to be a soft green was now a warm tan. Honda almost didn't recognize where he was. Though, he could still take in Ryou's scent. The familiar smell of cinnamon and vanilla calmed his stomach and eased the tension that was in his shoulders. He exhaled deeply before continuing on into the house.

Honda could see Bakura through the glass door that lead out to the small plot of grass that the Bakura's owned. Ryou refused to live in a home that didn't have some sort of outdoor area to be in. Honda liked that about him.

Bakura was laying on his back in the middle of the yard facing away from the door. He was shirtless and wearing torn denim. Honda shivered just looking at it. It wasn't exactly spring yet, but he doubts Bakura is capable of feeling cold.

Bakura did not move. Honda knew better than to believe Bakura didn't know he was there. Sure enough, Bakura stood up and a cloud of cigarette smoke floated into the air. He turned with his hands in his pockets and he said quietly, "You're late."

Honda smiled, "Didn't know you were so anxiously awaiting my arrival."

Bakura snuffed off the cigarette in the dirt, but he held the smudged filter in his hand as he approached the other man. "Don't be a wise ass. I know where you sleep." he gave Honda a crooked smirk, "It's only across the hall."

Honda laughed, "You haven't changed a bit."

"I hadn't changed over the course of a millennium. Did you honestly believe I would change in a single year?" He deposited the cigarette filter into a bucket by the door with the others.

"No, I guess not." Honda shrugged. The two stood there in silence. He mused over the times he had shared with Bakura. That bitter winter morning when Bakura threatened him in the kitchen didn't scream the beginning of a friendship to Honda, but over time, he felt like he could truly trust Bakura. After all, Bakura trusted Honda with his own insecurities about his feelings toward Ryou. To this day, Honda feels a little responsible for the two of them getting together, but he would never take all of the credit.

Bakura asked, "Did you find what you were looking for where you were?"

"Can't say I did." Honda admitted.

"I didn't think you would." Bakura spat, "Don't think I'm going to throw my arms around you and be all fucking excited that you're back, because I'm not your fucking mother." he scowled, "I'm going easy on you because you're one of the only decent people I know, but I'm telling you now, asshole, that was a pretty shitty thing to do."

"... I know." Honda shifted his gaze to the grass.

"Yeah, you do now." Bakura said, "But back then, you didn't think. Ryou was fucking heartbroken. We all were. Yeah, including me." he crossed his arms, "I want to believe you're a decent man. I used to." Bakura demanded, "Look at me." and Honda did. "Now, you've got to fucking prove it. Do you understand me?"

Locking eyes with Bakura was the same as shaking his hand. As Honda nodded and said, "Yes." he knew he was signing a human contract. He had some work to do.

"Alright then." Bakura said and placed a hand on Honda's shoulder, "It's good to see you." He moved past Honda and reentered the house, leaving him behind.

Honda didn't stay out in the backyard very long. He went back in and started to explore. Not only had the foyer been repainted, but the kitchen had as well. What once was a cheery yellow was now a mellow blue gray. However, the cabinetry remained the same ivory that Honda recalled and the counters were still dark stone. The very same counter Honda had spoken to Bakura on a man's level.

Bakura's words were beginning to dig deeper into Honda's mind and the more times he cycles them, the more guilt piled up in his gut. He knew he had hurt everyone when he just up and left like that, but to have it said to his face was worse than if Bakura had socked him in the mouth. At least that pain would have healed quickly.

He decided to wait until later to venture through upstairs. He made a quick stop in the living room and was satisfied to see that it was exactly the same as it had been when he used to come over for movie night. He noted his favorite spot on the couch was still as plush looking as ever and with a happy tap on the doorway frame, he went back out front to help the others.

Unpacking what little belongings Honda and Otogi had did not take much time at all. All of their furniture went into the spare room Ryou had cleaned out for them and any box that was labeled "kitchen" was placed in Ryou's father's closet for the time being. Ryou's father, of course, never needed to the closet since he was rarely home enough to use it.

Honda made the bed with Ryou while Otogi starting piling the clothes into the dresser. Bakura leaned against the window and provided company, which no one protested about. When the bed was made, Ryou went downstairs to prepare dinner. Even though all three men attempted to stop him from doing so, he insisted and announced that he would be making Honda's favorite stir fry in honor of their homecoming. Honda's stomach rumbled in celebration.

Shortly after, Bakura left the room to keep Ryou company in the kitchen. Otogi flashed him a knowing smile to which Bakura rolled his eyes. Honda chuckled and fell back into the pillows of his freshly made bed. Otogi immediately put down the shirt he was holding and crawled onto the bed with him. Honda laid on his back, propping his head up under his arm on the pillows. Otogi placed his head on Honda's shoulder, to which Honda put an arm around him. Together, they closed their eyes and shared a couple deep breaths. When he opened his eyes, Honda looked up at the white ceiling in general satisfaction. It was the first time his heart had stopped racing all day.

"Are you feeling any better?" asked Otogi.

"Yeah" he replied, "A lot."

"Good." Otogi snuggled into Honda's neck, turning to lay on his side. Honda curled some of Otogi's ponytail around his finger. He inhaled again, taking in the gentle smell of the clean linen. It mixed beautifully with Otogi's cologne. He felt like they were back in their flat in Tokyo.

Instead, they were home in Domino. A word like "home", which was usually supposed to bring comfort, brought Honda nothing but fear. He was anticipating seeing his friends one by one. He wasn't sure if they would all respond in the same way Ryou did. He knew that Bakura wasn't going to be the only one who would scold him.

Scolding reminded him of his mother. She was the one person that remained in Domino that Honda had not completely ignored. He answered her phone calls and made sure to send her flowers on her birthday and at Christmas. He had yet to tell her of his return to Domino. It gave him a little bit of breathing room, and he didn't want her to anticipate his arrival.

"What are you thinking about?"

Honda snorted, "How girly you are for asking me that." he tickled Otogi. This caused the other man to squirm and giggle. He fought off Honda's halfhearted assault. While Honda remained calmly laying on the bed, Otogi sat on his knees, blowing back the stray black hairs that had fallen into his face. His poked Honda's sides, "You're no fun! You're not ticklish."

"Nope." Honda said, chuckling at Otogi's playfulness. He reached over and attempted to tickle Otogi's smooth stomach.

Otogi pushed Honda's hand away, placing his hands on either side of Honda's middle and pressing their foreheads together. Honda watched as Otogi closed his eyes, his long eyelashes fluttering as he tried to calm his breathing from his laughter.

Without thinking, Honda placed his hands on Otogi's hips. Otogi's eyes slowly opened, exposing the green eyes that used to cause Honda to shiver. Now, they make him feel so safe, and he still gets goosebumps, but it felt different somehow.

"Hiroto." Otogi let the name roll off his tongue in a husky whisper. Honda licked his lips. He knew what was to come next. The kiss, the tongue, the tender nibble of the bottom lip, the moan, the beginning of something that he wasn't sure he wanted to start. This wasn't the first time this was brought to Honda's attention. This wasn't the last time what was in Honda's pant would stand at attention. Though, his usual response to the whole situation was exactly what he did next.

He removed his hands from his hips and placed them on the his chest. He shook his head and then adverted his gaze. Otogi sat back on his heels, tucked hair behind his ear, and sighed. He was the first to speak, "I'm..."

"Don't." Honda interrupted, "You didn't do anything wrong." he sat up and ran his fingers through his hair, "Look, Otogi. You don't have to be here with me. I appreciate everything you've done, but you really don't need to stay with me anymore. Or at least, I can move back with my ma. I know you want to stay here."

"Save it." Otogi said shortly, "You know I do because I want to. I'm not asking you to stay here with me." he held one arm with the opposing hand, "If you don't want to, I can't make you."

"It's not that I don't want to." Honda threw his head back and groaned, "I'm sorry I'm so fucking frustrating!" he rubbed his face with his hands, "I don't know what I want." he looked over at Otogi and immediately frowned over the troubled expression on his face. He reached out and held his pale face in his hands, "Otogi..."

Otogi leaned into the touch, placing his own hand over Honda's. He said softly, "We'll get through this. It's only the first day." he turned and kissed the hand.

"My little cheerleader." Honda chuckled. He leaned over and kissed Otogi's cheek, who accepted it with a smile.

"Guys! Dinner!" Ryou called from downstairs.

The two quickly kissed and got off the bed. Honda entered the hallway and inhaled deeply, "Oh man, that smells unbelievable!"

Otogi pushed Honda into the wall, "Too bad, I'm gonna eat it all!" he stuck out his tongue and headed for the stairs.

"Oh no you don't!" Honda protested. He caught up to Otogi and wrapped his arms around his slim middle. He lifted Otogi's feet off the top stair. Otogi yelped. He flailed as he laughed, "Put me down! Put me down!"

Ryou hid his laughter behind his hand as he watched from the bottom landing. Bakura poked his head out from the kitchen to see what the commotion. He rolled his eyes and said, "If this is what living with them is going to be like, I'm moving out." he stood beside Ryou with his hand on his hip.

"Oh shush, Yami." replied Ryou, "You love them just as much as I do." he smiled knowingly at his darker half.

Bakura murmured, "Not as much as I love you." and he planted a kiss on Ryou's temple. It was only a blip in time, but Honda noticed it. He smiled behind Otogi, who was too preoccupied in fixing his shirt to see what had happened. There was something that was different about the Bakura household that wasn't simply a couple coats of paint. Honda had been unable to point his finger on it until just now.

The entire environment shifted. When there was once dark tension, there is now a lightness to every step, every sound, and every moment feels genuine. Honda looked over at Ryou. He was pink in the cheeks, which was common for him when attention has been given to him. Though, Honda noticed, he was standing straight and his chin was higher. He was able to stand beside his darker half and not shudder or bite his lips. It was a welcoming sight.

"Well, come on!" Ryou said, making a path to the kitchen, "It's getting cold!" and the others quickly followed.

They all sat around the table that was already set by Bakura, no less. Honda took his seat across from Otogi. They shared a smile that Ryou interrupted by spooning rice onto Honda's plate, "I'll have no problem getting you to eat this!" he said cheerfully. With a kiss on the cheek that Bakura politely ignored, Ryou said to Honda, "Welcome home."

x-x-x

And that's the end of Chapter Two! I'm so glad to have gotten the feedback on Chapter One. You guys are the best. I'll try not to make it almost a month before the next update. I've taken a habit to type these chapters out on my iPhone at work. For shame. Haha See you at Chapter Three!


	3. Good Morning to Yesterday

Chapter Three: Good Morning to Yesterday

The morning light peeked through the blinds the next day and awoke Honda before his alarm. He rolled onto his back, rubbing one of his eyes. He blinked, realizing he wasn't in Tokyo anymore. His heart skipped a beat, but then he saw Otogi and recalled that he was no longer in Tokyo and today was the first full day of his homecoming.

This meant he had a lot of objectives for today. For starters, he promised himself he'd go see his mother. Then, most likely with Otogi and Ryou, he'd stop by the game shop and see what the fates had in store for his friendship with Yugi. If he wasn't too emotionally spent after all of that, his next step, was to find a job.

When he had spoken to Otogi before bed about finding a way to make income, he protested. "Ryou isn't asking for anything and I'm not either.."

"No." Honda replied, "I'm not sick. I don't have any excuse to sit on my ass." He left the room to brush his teeth. When he came back, Otogi didn't say another word about it.

Honda pulled on the same sweatpants from the night before. He kissed Otogi's forehead and smiled as the other man moaned and shifted a little in his sleep. He then made his way to the bathroom across the hall. After a splash of water on his face and a quick brushing of the teeth, he decided he would surprise Otogi with a cup of tea.

Only he was pleasantly surprised to see that Ryou was already in the kitchen pouring hot water into several mugs on the counter. He looked up and smiled warmly, "Good morning, Honda."

"Hey." he greeted back, taking a seat at the table.

Ryou set a mug down in front of Honda, "Would you like something light for breakfast? Toast?" he took a sip from his own white mug.

"I'm fine, thanks." Honda replied, fiddling with the string attach to the tea bag. He then felt a presence behind him. Turning his head, he was surprised to find that a silver striped tabby had wandered its way into the kitchen. Its ears were perked up and she walked with her chin high. "Oh. I didn't know you had a cat." He bent down to pet the feline that had paused beside Honda for attention.

"That's because she doesn't take kindly to strangers." came the voice of Bakura followed by the entrance of the dark spirit. He was already dressed and an unlit cigarette rested between his lips.

Honda continued to pet the elegant creature, "What's his name?"

"_She_," Bakura corrected, "is Ruby."

"Cute." replied Honda. He then smirked at the spirit that leaned against the doorway, "I never know you to be a cat person, Bakura."

Bakura scowled, "I never knew you to be missing your kidneys. I presume you'll want to keep it that way." and he turned and went out back to have his morning smoke. Ruby swiftly followed.

Honda laughed, "She seems very loyal to him."

Ryou, who had been silently enjoying his tea, nodded, "Oh yes. Bakura is very protective of her. He saved her from a speeding truck. She has been attached to him ever since." he smiled into his mug, "I cannot say he protests her companionship. Sometimes I wonder if he loves her more than me." he chuckled.

Honda joined in the laughter, "No kidding?" he ceased and took a pensive sip, "How is that going anyways?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You and Bakura."

Ryou suddenly got very quiet. He held his tea mug with both hands and smiled into the steaming liquid. "He... is so different. He is not at all what he used to be. He is sweet" he giggled, "and so gentle. I feel as if..." he chose his words carefully, "he was so restless before. I think now, he has found somewhere he can be comfortable." he caught Honda's eye, "We were living in chaos for so long. It is refreshing to simply sit back and enjoy life with one another."

"Wow." Honda replied, "I'm glad. That sounds great."

"It truly is. I wish such happiness on everyone, especially you." Ryou reached across the table and placed his petite hand upon Honda's, "You are worth so much more than you believe, Honda. I have spent the past months hoping that would understand that."

He considered himself to be a very simple man. The only materialistic possession he valued was his bike. He had enough clothes to get him through the week and he owned one pair of sneakers and one pair of boots. He didn't graduate high school and spent the past year delivering flowers so he could pay his share of the rent for a shitty apartment. As far as "worth" was concerned, Honda didn't believe he was worth very much at all. He had never put it into perspective like that before and again, he started feeling sick to his stomach.

Ryou lowered his eyes, realizing that he had said too much. He stood from the table and handed Honda the mug that had been abandoned on the counter, "Here. For Otogi." 

He nodded, "Thanks." He rose from the table and retrieved a bottle of honey and a spoon. He took both upstairs with the cup of tea.

There was something about looking at Otogi that made the world spin a little slower for Honda. His dark hair looked so out of place in the bright morning light, but Honda liked it. It felt more real, less angelic, a little dangerous.

He set down what was in his hands and he sat beside the sleeping man. He leaned down and whispered into Otogi's ear, "Good morning, Sleepyhead." 

Otogi smiled and rolled over onto his stomach. He buried his face in the pillow and groaned. Honda chuckled, "It's almost noon. I brought you tea."

"Is there honey?" Otogi lifted his head from the pillow and gave Honda a hopeful look.

"I don't know how much you like so I brought the bottle."

Otogi immediately sat up, "A tablespoon."

Honda passed the tea to Otogi and opened the bottle. He poured the sticky amber onto the spoon and placed it into the mug. Otogi's watched intently. His brilliant eyes causing Honda's hand to shake as he stirred.

When he finished, Otogi took a sip, "Thank you."

"Sure." replied the other man. He closed the bottle and licked the dab of honey that had leaked out onto his fingertip.

They sat there for a moment and enjoyed each other's company. Otogi continued drinking his tea. When he was nearly finished he asked, "What do you feel like doing today?"

"I have to visit my ma."

"Oh, that sounds exciting." he replied sincerely, "She'll be thrilled to see you."

Honda rubbed the back of his neck, "Yeah. I'm pretty excited to see her."

"Nervous at all?"

"Oh yeah."

"You gonna go dressed like that?"

Honda looked down at his baggy sweatpants and a shirt he's worn so often, the color has faded and there's a hole forming in the bottom seam. He grinned sheepishly, "I was gonna change."

Otogi giggled, "Okay then. Just making sure." he pulled the covers back and leaned over. He kissed Honda's cheek, "Thanks again for the tea."

"Sure thing." Honda said. He headed over the dresser to find something more suitable to wear. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Otogi emerge from the bed and raise his arms up to stretch. He admired the muscles that flexed in his back and how his ponytail tickled between his shoulder blades.

The heat suddenly lowered to his groin. Honda knew better than to act upon it. He couldn't imagine carrying the weight of any kind of relationship right now. Otogi understood that. However, it has been a long time since he'd felt the touch of another man. Sure, they kiss all the time, but the idea of Otogi's kisses on his skin made Honda bite down hard on his lip.

"... Hiroto?"

"Huh?"

"Are you okay?"

"'m fine." he said as he slid out of the room without facing him. He walked briskly into the bathroom where he locked the door. He immediately began to strip and turn on the shower. In the midst of the steam, he allowed himself to lean against the wall of the shower, close his eyes, and stand underneath the water.

Lately, he felt as if his relationship with Otogi was getting unintentionally complicated. Maybe it was because of these constant urges. Honda wasn't sure if it was because he was lonely or if it had to do with Otogi himself. As a person, he was loyal to the very end. He held on for every ride Honda put him on. He was understanding, funny, and successful. Honda knew that he'd support him.

There was no denying the physical attraction. Otogi had a gorgeous trim body, sexy black hair, and his eyes always drove Honda into insanity. He was frequently having little fantasies. Even now, he imagined that each water droplet was a separate kiss and as they slid down his chest.

Honda leaned his body forward, holding himself up with a hand against the tiled wall. He imagined Otogi slipping behind him. Honda's hand on his body became Otogi's hand. He moaned, feeling his pulse quickening.

The more he imagined, the less he thought of Otogi. The pretend figure behind Honda became taller, broader, more muscular. Honda tightened his grip and bit his lip. Everything became faster, harder, more passionate. Honda could feel ice blue eyes piercing through the heat that was building. More and more Honda started to shake, biting back a cry as he hit the peak.

Gasping, Honda opened his eyes. He stood up straight, eyes darting around the shower as if he was searching for what he had just seen in his head. Slowly, he regained his normal breathing. He shuddered as he turned the water off. The warmth quickly left his body and goosebumps scattered over the surface of his skin.

He covered his face with a towel as he breathed out his name.

_Seto._

The man who started it all. Honda would never blame him. There was something about Tokyo that had helped distract him, but he could never forget. There was no forgetting two years ago. The drama, the backstabbing, the pain that had driven Honda out of Domino in the first place was already coming back to him.

There was a soft knock on the door, "... Babe?" he recognized it to be Otogi's.

He wrapped the towel around his waist and opened the door a crack, "Yeah?" he peeked his head out.

"Oh." Otogi said, shifting his eyes away from the shirtless man, "You were in there for a while. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

"Heh yeah. Sorry. I fell asleep standing up." Honda tried his best to smile.

Otogi laughed, "Can I brush my teeth? I have to get to the store."

"Sure." He opened the door wider and allowed him to walk in. As he left the bathroom, he heard Otogi hum as he brushed his teeth. A smile spread across Honda's lips as he instantly recognized the little ritual he did everyday. It seemed to make Honda's insides untwist and he was able to get dressed and make his way downstairs with little distraction.

He spotted Ruby sitting gracefully on the back on the couch in the living room. He only assumed Bakura was sprawled out on said couch since it was facing away from him. He called out, "Hey, Bakura?"

"What ails you now?" came a voice from the other side of the couch. Honda had been correct. He stepped into the living room and leaned over the couch back. Bakura was indeed laying on his back with his arms supporting his head. One foot was resting on one arm of the couch while the other swayed over the edge. He opened a sharp dark eye at Honda. He wasn't glaring, but there was no smile on his face.

Petting Ruby with one hand and smirking down at Bakura with the other, he stated, "It's much easier to find you with Ruby around."

"If I didn't want to be found, I'd actually hide."

Rolling his eyes, Honda pressed on, "Right. Well, could you tell Ryou that I won't be home for dinner? I'm going to be at my ma's."

"Will do." Bakura said, closing his eyes and exhaling through his nose, "I'm glad to see you heading over there."

Honda smiled warmly, knowing that Bakura couldn't see it, but would feel it. "Thanks. I'll see you later." and he left the house with his keys and helmet in hand.

The ride from Ryou's to Honda's childhood home was a familiar one to him. Honda never needed to stop to recall where he was. For a moment, he felt as if he had never left Domino at all. It was just an average sunny day and he had spent the day joking around with his best friends. Now, it was time for an early supper with his mother and father.

_Those were the days_...

Instead, Honda parked his bike outside of the house, planted both his feet on the ground and pulled off his helmet. He took several breaths, knowing that there was a small chance of no one being home. He didn't want to imagine what he would do if that were the case.

He approached the front door with as much confidence he could muster. There was no stranger sensation than feeling like a stranger at your own front door. He knocked softly and waited. He didn't look around for changes. He knew his mother wasn't keen on changing things she thought were perfectly fine. He stared straight ahead at the door and waited.

"Just a minute!" his stomach did a somersault at the sound of his mother's voice. It was a warm melody that swam through his ears and coaxed his fluttering body into calming down. Shortly after he heard her, he saw her. She opened the door and eyes identical to his stared back at him.

Her jaw went lax, and she held a delicate hand over her heart. "Oh my goodness." she said, running her eyes up and down Honda, trying to make sense of what she was seeing.

He took note of her graying hair and her thin wrinkles, but he was indeed looking at his mother. She still had kind eyes and blushed cheeks. When the shock had finally left her, she smiled as warmly as she always had. "Hiroto!" was all she said before wrapping her arms tightly around her son.

"Hey, Ma." he blissfully shut his eyes and returned her embrace.

He heard her sniffle before they parted. She hid her tears, rubbed his shoulders and arms, and said, "Oh. Look at you. You look like the walking dead. Come on in. I'll make you something to eat."

He laughed, "You're still the same."

She snorted, "Heavens, no. Look at me. I'm an old lady now." she smoothed her hair.

"You look beautiful." was his immediate response. It made her smile as she led him back into the house. She made a straight path to the kitchen while Honda lingered in the foyer. She called out behind her, "Your father is still at the office. If you had called, we could have worked out a dinner or something."

"I didn't want you to stress about me stopping by." Honda answered. He ran his finger tips along the picture frames on the hutch in the hallway, "I'm not worth fussing about."

"Of course you are." she said, leaning out into the corridor to frown at him, "How many sons do you think I have? Don't get me started on how concerned I've been about you. Your father's been a mess too. You rarely call. I don't even know where you live, what you've been eating, if you're working. I wouldn't have been surprised if I got a call saying you died somewhere." she shuddered and returned to the kitchen.

Honda shoved his hands in his pockets, "I'm sorry for making you worry. It's been kind of crazy." he entered the kitchen, taking a seat at the eat in table and holding his head up with his hand, "I had to get out of here for a while."

"Honey..." she said, putting a mug of tea in front of Honda before getting out a pan, "I know things aren't right since Jo-"

"Don't."

She pursed her lips and started over, "Even before that, you seemed so distracted." Honda shifted his eyes away. She sighed, "I don't tell you how to live your life. I could never be disappointed by you, but you dropped out of school and just... left like that." she took a moment to wipe a tear forming in the corner of her eye, "I'm so happy to see you come home."

Honda bit the inside of his cheek. He exhaled through his nose and said, "I'm happy to be back. I don't know how everyone's going to take it though."

"Oh, I know some people you're not in good graces with." she paused in her cooking to think, "I know Yugi will greet you with warm arms, but that girl he spends so much time with has said nothing but trash about you." she scowled, "She's not welcome here at the moment." she smiled and turned down the temperature of the stove, "Ryou stopped by once or twice. He's such a kind heart."

"I know. That's where I'm staying."

"I knew you would be. Is he seeing someone? I can't imagine a gentleman like that without a lovely girlfriend."

Bakura came to mind and Honda stifled a laugh. He cleared his throat, "I don't think so, but he's very happy."

"Well, that's all that matters, now isn't it?" she set down an omelet with a pile of rice for Honda. She took a seat next to him and tucked a strand of silver behind her ear, "Speaking of girlfriends..." she gripped onto her apron, "there's something you should know."

Honda, who had lifted his chopsticks, immediately lowered them and made straight eye contact, "What?"

"It's about Shizuka." she looked down at the floor, "It's nothing serious. She... she went missing."

"Missing?" he repeated.

"It was a short while after you did. Yugi showed up at my door looking for her. He said she didn't leave a note or anything. She emptied her bank account, packed a single bag, and she was gone." she placed a hand over her mouth as a tear slid down her face, "We don't think she's in Domino. Her father put out a police search for her, but we haven't heard anything. After six months, the police gave up. Her family is devastated."

"Ma, please don't cry." Honda said with his eyes wide. He wiped the tear from his mother's face and placed a hand on her shoulder.

"I don't understand anything anymore." she said, "Life used to be so much simpler. With everything that's happened in the past year, I don't know how to get through the days anymore. I pray and pray with hope that she'll come home." she placed a hand on his cheek, "That you would find the light amongst all of this darkness. I can't understand what's been troubling you for all this time, Hiroto." she begged him with her eyes, "I want so badly to help you."

"Ma... I..." Honda had never told her about his sexuality. He used to bring girls home all the time to lower suspicion. Even though his mother always supported him through everything he's done and she had just said she couldn't be disappointed in him, there was something about telling her about this secret he's kept inside for so long that didn't sit right. It would be another heartache to her. He looked at her bloodshot eyes and her tousled hair. In his opinion, she didn't need more trauma.

"Eat up." she said, standing from the table and wiping her eyes a final time, "It's going to get cold." she began cleaning up.

Honda looked down at the plate that his mother had lovingly put together for him. After hearing about Shizuka, he had no desire to eat, but it had been so long since he's eaten a homemade meal from her. He picked up his chopsticks and said, "Thanks, Ma." before digging in. As soon as he took the first bite, he felt warm inside and his shoulders relaxed. He took the next ten minutes to enjoy the simple meal. For the first time in the past few days, he finally felt at home.


	4. Good Night

A/N: I apologize to those who have been awaiting the next chapter. I know it's not fair that I take months and months before you hear from me again. Adult life is so hard to get a grip on and I don't have the luxury of free time like I did as a teen. Thank you all for being so understanding and I won't hold out on chapter four any longer! Thank you.

Chapter Four – Good Night

It was a little after dinner with his parents when Honda decided to take off. He had to make a promise that he would be back soon and would not take off again. He shook hands with his father in oath and squeezed his mother tight. He drove away knowing that he was going to be able to keep his word.

His final stop for the night was Yugi's. He felt like he owed it to the boy to personally announce his return before he found out through someone else. When the door opened, he was a little surprised to see Anzu snake around his arm.

"Honda!" Yugi cried in disbelief, flinging Anzu off as he embraced him, "Is it really you!"

"Hey, Yuge." Honda smiled, returning the hug. He looked over at Anzu and waved, "Hi, Anzu."

"Hello." she replied cooly before disappearing into the kitchen. _Where she belongs, _Honda thought to himself. He didn't understand why he felt so bitter. He has never had a problem with her before. However, there was something different about walking into the old game shop. It wasn't as warm as Ryou's. Honda felt... empty.

"Ah, sorry about that." Yugi said, smiling sheepishly, "She's not too happy with you right now."

"It's okay. I understand." Honda said, shoving his hands into his pocket, "How are you? Where is Yami?"

"Oh." Yugi shifted his eyes to the floor, "Yami doesn't live here anymore." he said in a small voice, "We're currently not speaking."

"What?" Honda gasped, "You and Yami? What happened?"

Yugi closed his eyes, looking as if the whole situation caused him great pain, "Not in front of Anzu." he smiled again, "Besides, it's not important. Where have you been? Are you alright? Are you home for good? Oh, sorry." he covered his mouth, "I'm being intrusive."

"No." Honda replied, "You deserve to know. Wanna go somewhere to talk?" he nodded toward the kitchen, "Since she doesn't want me here, I don't want to be rude."

"It's alright." Yugi said, "We can go into the livingroom. I hope you still know the way." he laughed.

"I think I can manage." Honda smirked and followed Yugi into the house.

They caught up on the same green sofa they used to waste days on. In fact, nothing about the old hang out had changed. Nothing except for the people. Yugi was the only one there, listening to Honda pour out the past year onto the same coffee table they would play Duel Monsters on.

Honda observed as Yugi tugged at fray threads and didn't always look Honda in the eyes. Something had changed about him. He was much more soft spoken and when Honda would ask about Yami, he would change the subject or brush it off. He vaguely reminded him of Ryou when they first met.

"Hey, Yuge." A thought had suddenly come back to Honda, "What happened to Shizuka?"

Yugi got very quiet. He shifted a little in his seat and after a long pause, he said, "She's gone."

"Yeah. I know, but where did she go?"

Yugi shook his head, "No one knows. She was gone the night you left and we haven't heard from her."

"No way." Honda breathed. He felt his face stiffen, "... I'm sorry. This is my fault."

Yugi shook his head, "No, Honda. No one blames you for any of it."

"I just feel like when I left, everything fell apart. I never thought it would be such a big impact on everyone."

Yugi placed a hand on Honda's shoulder, "We love you, Honda." Honda's mouth turned upwards at the present tense. "Of course we were all hurt when you left, but you had your reasons. We're just happy you're home. You'll always be a friend to us."

Honda nodded, "Thanks, Yuge."

They hadn't noticed that it was nearly midnight. Anzu, who had probably been eavesdropping the entire time, finally came in and said that it was time for Yugi to join her in bed. Yugi showed him out. They made plans later to meet up again before Honda started up his motorcycle and headed back to Ryou's.

The quickest way was a drive through the business district. It wasn't an ideal plan to Honda, but he was sure that Otogi and Ryou were worried sick due to the late hour. Honda realized he should have called while he was at Yugi's to check in, but it was past that point now. He passed a bakery and was reminded of Shizuka.

_Where could she have gone?_ Honda wondered. It didn't seem completely irrational that Shizuka would run off after all that had happened to her, but that didn't comfort Honda in the slightest. He racked his brain, making an effort to think of where she could have possibly gone with little funds and no connections. _Except..._

A car horn honked. Honda had been so deep in thought, he didn't realize that he had gone through a red light. He nearly missed a jet black car before his bike toppled and he was dragged along the gritty asphalt.

Honda staggered to his hands and knees. He attempted to put pressure on one and winced. He looked down. Sure enough, the leg of his jeans was torn open and hot blood seeped out of a gash.

He removed his helmet. Other than that, he seemed fine. He blinked a few times before inspecting the scene. The car was still there, pulled over on the side of the road with its hazard lights on. It seemed as if the driver was still in it. Honda couldn't make out anyone from the tinted windows. People who had been passing by stopped to stare. One asked if Honda was alright. He replied by waving and telling everyone to go about their business. They did so with no hesitation.

He stood, clenching his jaw in mild pain caused from his knee. He was going to be able to get back home, but he would have to bandage his wound when he got there. He hoped that Bakura would be the only one awake and would not question him.

As Honda picked up his bike, he had turned his back on the car that was involved. He heard the door open and slam shut. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath to collect his thoughts before he received the verbal whiplash that was coming to him.

He faked the most sincere smile he could. As he turned around, he said, "I'm so sorry!"

"You had fucking better be."

Honda's eyes became wide. He dropped his helmet and staggered backward. His entire body began to shake and he felt his throat tighten in fear. Those piercing blue eyes, that strong stance, an intimidating tone, "Kaiba."

He was not the only who was stunned. It seemed as if Kaiba had subconsciously been snide. Now, as Honda openly stared, Kaiba also stood frozen, his eyes wide in surprise and his mouth open to catch the raindrops that had began to fall sparingly from the sky. Honda wasn't sure if it was the rain or his own tears silently sliding down his cheeks. To be honest, he wasn't sure about anything at the moment. If he had to guess, he would believe that time had abruptly stopped still.

Kaiba was the one to gather his wits first. He closed his mouth to form a thin line that was neither a smile or frown. His eyes blinked and were back to their usual frigid state. He reached up and touched a device built into the collar of his jacket. "Kaiba." he said, "I need a pick up. Silver motorcycle. One block east." he balled his hand into a fist as he lowered it to his side. He went over to his car and opened the door. He looked back at Honda from the corner of his eye, "Get in." His voice carried with no emotion.

The voice had gotten through the static that had been cluttering Honda's head. He cleared his throat in an attempt to loosen the tension. He made no effort to get into Kaiba's passenger seat.

"No." Honda heard his own voice come from his mouth, but it sounded so far away. Kaiba's brow knit together. He didn't speak, but his stance was prepped for battle. He cleared his throat and tried again, "Stay away from me."

Kaiba slammed the door. The raindrops exploded from the exterior. He advanced toward him. Honda took a step back, wondering if he should climb on his bike and make a run for it.

Before he could act, Kaiba had his arms around him and Honda inhaled the smell of the rain mingling with the aroma that had always been Kaiba. The fragrance of expensive cologne and musk made Honda's insides flutter. Completely out of impulse, Honda leaned up and he crushed his lips against Kaiba's. He groaned and clung to Kaiba's quickly dampening jacket. His mind was in the thickest of hazes. Everything he had worked so hard to forget immediately came back to him.

When they pulled apart, Kaiba went over and opened the car door and repeated, "Get in." This time, Honda silently obeyed.

Kaiba started the car and Honda's brain seemed to work again. He smacked his hands into his face and placed his forehead against his knees. He started to shudder and immediately regret what he had done.

"I didn't feel the need to respect the wishes of someone who doesn't deserve it." Kaiba had yet to put the vehicle into drive. Through the tinted windshield, he watched as a Kaibacorp van pulled up and started to load Honda's bike into it. He breathed heavily through his nose, "You don't deserve to get what you want anymore. You have been selfish for way too long, Hiroto."

"Selfish?" Honda asked, lifting his face from his lap to stare at Kaiba in bewilderment.

"Yes, selfish!" Kaiba snapped harshly. He gripped the steering wheel tightly, "You always think about yourself! You wallow in your own self loathing because you can't have what you want! You use this fucked up justification in your head to feel as if you deserve to steal it, like you're some underdog hero. In actuality, you're really skulking around behind people's backs and ruining the trust between you and your best friend! You prove your cowardice by taking off without a damn clue as to where you're going or when you'll come back!" his voice became a low, vehemence hiss, "You destroyed a man who had already felt like he'd lost everything in this world by taking away the one thing he felt was worth having. Yes, Hiroto, you are the most selfish mother fucker I have ever met. I was perfectly content with never seeing you again." His chest heaved rapidly as he attempted to catch his breath through his nose.

"Oh yeah!" Suddenly, Honda felt a rage that had been laying dormant in his gut, "Then why not end it! Why didn't you just hit me with your car and kill me! Run over my head and then back up for good measure. Splatter the street with my brains for all I care!" he slammed his fists on the black dashboard, "SHIT! Someone just kill me!" he placed the heel of his hands onto his forehead. Leaning over his lap, he began to shake uncontrollably.

Kaiba spat, "Requesting that your life be over. Don't be so melodramatic. Be a fucking man."

"I am a _faggot_!" Honda declared, his eyes meeting Kaiba's for the first time, "It's because of you that I am this way!" this sudden realization made Honda see hot white light, "If I didn't fall in love with you, we would have still been friends! I could have been there for him! _He would still be alive_!"

A burning sensation throbbed on the left side of his face. He reached up and felt that he had been struck, Kaiba inspecting his hand for redness. Honda grit his teeth, "_Don't you put your hands on me_."

Kaiba leaned forward, his nose nearly tickling Honda's, "Are you even listening to yourself? You don't call the shots, Hiroto. _I _do and I say that you had been pipe down before you get me _really_ angry." His stare made Honda tense up. Kaiba decided to take his silence as compliance. "Now, let's get one thing clear. I don't ever want to hear the term 'faggot' out of your mouth ever again. It makes you sound ignorant and what's more so is that you believe your coming out is all _my_ fault." he smirked darkly, "I don't think so, Buddy. Let's try to recall the events here." he finally shifted the car into drive and they took off down the road. "I was perfectly content, hell I'd even dare say I was _'happy'_." his eyes shifted over at Honda, who was now picking at the sides of his fingernails until they bled, "You strut your shit into _my_ office, seduce _me_, and request that _I_ leave all of my hard work and loyalty for _you_."

"I never asked for that!" Honda snapped in protest, his teeth stripping a large chunk of skin out of his thumb as he cocked his head to face the man behind the wheel. The pain was only a dull sensation in comparison to how dizzy his head felt.

"Shut up." He pressed lightly on the brake as he slowed for a stop light, "Let's continue." he sped up as soon as the light became green.

"I'm trying to juggle a company, a family, an _affair_, and still make it home in time to take care of my severely ill lover." Kaiba seemed to no longer be talking to anybody but himself. Honda focused his eyes on his thumb, pinching his wound to make the crimson run down his finger. It was his only distraction from hearing the harsh mouths pouring out of his mouth.

Kaiba continued as they rounded the corner, "He _dies_. Nothing will change the fact that he fucking _dies,_ and there was no one to comfort me. I had to keep pressing on, acting as if he and I were complete _strangers_, let alone lovers. The only one I thought I would have is the man I almost gave it all up for." his eyes darted over to Honda, who had whimpered a little in hearing himself be mentioned. "But no, instead he invites himself into my bed, takes what he wants of me, which seems to only be my _body_, and takes off into the sunrise. No note, no call, and soon, there was no one there. I had to convince myself that you even goddamn _existed_." He turned left and Honda recognized that they were in front of KaibaCorp. "Then, a year later, just when I think I've got myself back on track. I have my company, my family, my _lover._.." Honda inhaled sharply in surprise, "and look who shows up, the bitch that's just as selfish as he was before he left."

Kaiba pulled into his parking space. He put car into a complete stop and flailed his hands as he mocked Honda, "'Someone kill me!'" he laughed darkly, throwing his head back in a maniacal manner, "Fuck you, Hiroto." he said as he met eyes again with the brunet in the passenger seat, "Seriously, go fuck yourself." he turned the keys out of the ignition and immediately pocketed them. He exited the vehicle, the slamming of the door was Honda's invitation to speak again.

Hastily, Honda unbuckled his seat belt and hoisted himself out of the car. He ran around the frame and stood a foot away from Kaiba, his eyes black and his mouth turned down. His fists were shaking, the blood from his thumb dripped a single drop onto the tar ground. He swallowed hard, for he had to choose his words with great care.

The rain had cleared and they were seeing each other in true light for the first time. Kaiba looked different than Honda recollected. There was something in his face. He looked older and his eyes had an emptiness in them. Honda missed that spark behind them, the intensity that had always made him weak in the knees.

He remembered the night that Kaiba had mentioned. The night his virginity was taken. He had held Honda's face in his hands, kissing each finger on his hand and he said it clear as day. He would never forget, "Back then," he said aloud, "that night, you said you _loved_me."

"I was wrong." Honda was taken back by the lack of hesitation in Kaiba's voice, "Just as I was wrong to say he was obsessive and possessive. It was before I knew..." he got quiet, "before I had _realized_ he was sick." He somehow found a way to stand taller. Honda felt like a child. "I should have never ruined such a beautiful thing. I will regret you and I for the rest of my life." he turned to walk away, "Your bike should be waiting for you out front. Consider this closure. I meant it when I said I never want to see you again. Do you understand me? If you come anywhere near me, I can't be held responsible for what may happen to you."

Honda looked down at the ground. His head was swimming. There was still so much going through his mind. Closure? He was more confused than before. He could recall the feeling of Kaiba's desk against the back of his thighs, a hungry push from Kaiba so his body could be sprawled out across the surface. He remembered looking out the floor to ceiling windows upside down, his head falling over the edge as his emotions reached the brink. Night after night of lips touching every inch of soft skin. Honda felt the hot breath of Seto against his ear, hearing soft groans of protest when Honda had refused him farther than kisses. _Seto_. Honda looked up at the retreating figure. He had not been speaking to the same man he fell in love with.

"Seto!" Honda cried out, as if trying to reach somebody who wasn't there. He hadn't thought of what he'd follow it up with. He still wasn't even sure what he was doing, in the darkest hours of night, running towards the shadow of a man he used to devote his entire being to. All he knew was that he didn't know what he'd do if let it end like this.

Kaiba hadn't stopped walking. Even as he heard his name called out, he refused to let his strides slow. He was almost at the door, moments away from locking out the last of his past from ever reaching him again. He thought he had been over this.

"Seto!" Honda called again, his arm outstretched. He couldn't give up. He thought his feet couldn't carry him fast enough, but he was able to grip onto the man's sleeve and there, he refused to let go. With all he could, he wrapped himself around Kaiba's arm like a child who was being left alone for the first time. He squeezed his eyes shut and prayed to anyone who listened that he didn't look as pathetic as he felt.

Kaiba's hand had been on the handle of the door leading to KaibaCorp, the other holding a key in the lock. He lowered his arms and looked down at the boy who still had a long way to go. He sighed and demanded quietly, "Let go, Honda."

"_Hiroto_. Call me _Hiroto. _Please." Honda begged.

"Let go of me." Kaiba repeated, "I have nothing left to say to you."

"No!" Honda cried, "I let you go before! I won't ever do it again! Please!" he begged again, "Please don't tell me to go. I can't be without you again." his body was shivering from the cold the rain had left him with.

Kaiba was growing impatient. He spun and shoved Honda away, his hands balled up in case that hadn't been enough. He watched as Honda staggered, trying to regain his balance. Then, he spoke. "Get a hold of yourself. You're embarrassing. To think I could ever be with someone so _pathetic._" He opened the doors to KaibaCorp and turn to give him one last disapproving look. Instead, he let go of the door, letting it shut slowly. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his long trench coat. Honda was standing, ready to fight him though his body was trembling violently. Kaiba wasn't sure if it was because he was scared or cold. He shook his head and smirked, "That's the Honda I know. Ready to fight for what he wants until it gets too hard. Well, what do I need to do, Honda? What's your breaking point this time? How much longer do I need to stand out here in the middle of the night waiting for you to give up and run?" he leaned forward and whispered firmly, "_Get out of my face."_

This was getting painful and Honda knew it. If someone had been watching the whole thing unfold, they'd be yelling at Honda to throw in the towel, but Honda never prided himself for knowing when to call it quits. Life wasn't a perfectly timed episode. There were no correct ways to end a conversation. There was never a clean way to end a fight.

"You know what, Seto?" Honda said, using the last shred of courage he had, "It takes two to fuck! You claim that it was all on me but you need to take responsibility too, you know!" he stood up straighter and let his hands unclench.

He felt tears burning his eyes but he didn't dare cry. "It took me too long to realize my mistakes and I have been paying for it over and over again. I don't think you'll ever see where my pain comes from and it's because you're too busy being cold to take an interest but that's not my problem!" he lifted his arms and shrugged. He shook his head and sighed, "Nobody's fucking perfect. I thought you of all people would understand that." he added quietly, "I thought you would understand _me._"

Kaiba snorted, "You still don't _get it_, do you?" he reopened the door, "Goodbye, Honda." and before Honda could say another word, he had escaped.


	5. 5 am

Chapter Five – 5 am

He couldn't remember how he had gotten back to Ryou's. How he had managed to get back without driving his bike over a cliff still baffled him. Still, as the sun was kissing the sky line, Honda slipped through the front door. He was greeted by Ruby, who had sensed him approaching. Honda knelt down and pet her before removing his shoes. In that brief moment, he had pushed Kaiba out of his mind.

It wasn't until he saw the light on in the kitchen that he realized Ruby had been awake for a reason. Slowly, he crept toward the light, unsure as to who would be up at this hour. Was it really that close to morning that Ryou was up? Or was it Bakura, wandering around with his insomnia rampant?

He felt a rough, wet texture on his knee. He winced in pain and looked down to see Ruby was attempting to clean his wound from his crash. Looking up at the ceiling, he hoped it would be Bakura in the kitchen. He didn't have a tale to tell if Ryou requested answers.

He stood in the middle of the threshold and froze. He didn't realize it would be the both of them. In the short moment he had seen into the kitchen, he had seen too much. Ryou had his legs pressed against the counter, facing the back splash. His nails clawed into the faces of the cabinets above him and he was glistening in a light sheet of sweat. His yami was behind him, his hands on Ryou's thin hips and his anatomy inside him. His neck almost snapped with the force of how quickly he turned to face the doorway.

Quickly, Honda raced backwards, pressing his body against the wall, as if to hide his presence. _Bakura had seen him_. Honda had caught the dark smirk spread across his face and his eyes shining in ecstasy. His stomach sank as his heart rose into his throat.

Ryou's soft whimpers from the kitchen caused Honda's face to flush to a dark crimson. That doorway was between him and his only way upstairs. He knew the right thing to do would be to turn and go back the way he had came. He'd have to sit outside until they were done.

Just as he turned for the door, he heard Ryou, "N-no! Not yet! I want to see you!" Honda bit his lip, knowing he was completely overstepping all boundaries. At this point, he knew he was caught so what else was there to lose? He peeked one eye around the corner into the kitchen. There, he saw that Bakura had indeed turned Ryou around by throwing him onto the table. Honda made a mental note to not eat there until the tablecloth was changed.

Bakura pulled Ryou to the edge of the table, allowing himself to reenter his lover. Ryou cried out, throwing his head back with his eyes closed. Honda backed away in case Ryou had opened his eyes, but he didn't. Instead, he pulled himself up, wrapping his body as much as he could around Bakura and with each thrust, his moans got louder and more urgent.

Just when Honda was ready to walk away again, he heard Ryou reach his climax, his petite frame shuddering as he came. Honda placed his hands over his mouth in complete shock. The imagine of Ryou throwing his head back in estasy was something he had once fantasized about, but never thought he'd ever see. Bakura grunted, finishing soon afterward. Ryou's chest heaved heavily with his hairs still tangled in his yami's hair. He kissed the other man softly, whispering as he pulled away, "Oh I love you, Yami."

"And I you." Honda's heart softened as he watched the darker spirit completely let his guard down and kiss the smaller boy on the forehead. He then realized that he was open for capture at this point and swiftly retreated back outside. In his haste, he had forgotten to put on his shoes. He hopped from one cold foot to the other, trying to keep them as dry as possible with little success. He felt dirty. He wasn't sure how Bakura would be react. Honda was mentally preparing himself for a punch in the face.

As he suspected, the front door opened and out crept Bakura, a cigarette already pressed between his lips. He stood on the front porch, lighting it without looking at Honda. As he exhaled the first drag, he asked, "Did you enjoy the show?" he offered the pack and lighter to Honda.

Honda awkward accepted, his eyes adverting Bakura's. He blurted out, "I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to s-see."

"What happened to your leg?" Bakura changed the subject with a cool calm that Honda envied.

"Fell off my bike." Honda knew better than to lie.

Bakura took another puff of his smoke, exhaling out of his nose as he spoke, "You're not usually so careless. Was it the rain?"

"Yes." he answered too quickly.

"Ah." Bakura clearly did not believe him. He paused, "Well Ryou can patch that up for you, I'm sure."

"Bakura, I'm really sorry I was spying." Honda tried again, "I didn't mean anything by it."

"People change." Bakura said in a matter of fact tone. He looked on at the skyline, watching it get brighter by the minute. Honda could already see Bakura's face clearly in the early morning light. "I never thought I'd give in to such a vulnerable state of being, Honda." Bakura admitted, "It goes against everything I stand for to give so much of myself to someone. One day, they might wake up and walk away." His eyes met Honda's.

To avoid feeling even more awkward, Honda quickly inhaled. He coughed, "I know."

"I don't think you do." Bakura stated, still speaking as if his voice was just returning to him after a long absence, "A proud man would rather lose his tongue than use it to preach of things he didn't believe in."

"Huh?" Honda still didn't understand. He shrugged and continued to inhale the tobacco. The earlier events from the evening hadn't quite sunk in yet. Honda took his time taking in the smoke, knowing he couldn't stop the inevitable, but he could delay it.

"Never mind." Bakura said, flicking his filter across the lawn. He shoved both hands into his pants pockets (they were undone of course) and asked, "How were your parents?"

Honda wasn't sure if he was making polite conversation or if he was genuinely curious. Whatever the reason, it was better than the tension. "Fine." he said simply.

"Surely you didn't stay with them so late?" Bakura raised an eyebrow in suspicion.

"Uh yeah. I lost track of the time." This was also not a lie.

Bakura snorted, "That might work on Ryou and Otogi, but you are mental if you think I'm going to let that go." he took out his pack and put another cigarette to his lips, "I'm gonna light this since I think we're going to be out here for a while."

Honda sighed, flicking his finished cigarette across the lawn. There was a small satisfaction in it landing further than Bakura's. He took a deep breath of fresh air and leaned against the house. He retraced his steps of the night and told the story to Bakura. He was kind to not interrupt. When he mentioned Kaiba, Honda sensed Bakura's shock, but he pressed on.

He spared no detail. He spoke of the one kiss and how Kaiba had verbally spat in his face. It took until Honda remembered the harsh words Kaiba had said that he had to stop and caught himself from tearing up. When he was done, he let it be quiet, enjoying the sound of the birds awakening. Occasionally, a car driven by an early commuter would pass by.

It took several moments before Bakura replied. He sighed deeply, "Well it's no surprise Anzu hates you. You know how protective she is of people she cares about. 'Shining friendship' and all that shit." he rolled his eyes, "She's gotten even crazier since she started dating Yugi. Nobody saw that coming. We expected Yugi to be with his yami. You know, the natural thing to do." Bakura shrugged, "But the pharaoh..." he stopped himself.

"Yeah, where is he? Yugi said they aren't speaking." Honda vaguely recalled.

"Not important." Bakura answered, "Not right now, anyways." he raised both arms in the air and stretched, "I think it's time for you to get some rest. Otogi's probably worried sick since you didn't come to bed and if Ryou doesn't clean you up, you'll risk infection." he opened the front door without a sound.

Honda straightened up, "Wait- what about...?"

"As difficult as this concept is to you, _let it go_." Bakura advised, "Just get some sleep. We can talk later if you so desire." he offered Honda to go ahead of him, "I have other things to do than listen to your troubles all day."

"M'sorry." Honda murmured and he meant it. He hadn't realized how much time he had spent with Bakura since he had arrived. Guilt suddenly overcame him and he was, again, staring at the ground.

"Oh, will you cut the crap and get inside?" Bakura snapped, firmly but not roughly pushing Honda into the threshold. He stepped around Honda, swooped down to scoop up Ruby, and took off down the corridor without another word.

When Honda entered the kitchen, he noted that the tablecloth was now missing from the table entirely. Ryou was busying himself over the sink, washing his kettle for tea. He looked over his shoulder when he heard a chair scrape along the floor. "Oh, good morning, Honda." he said with a kind smile. Honda tried not to notice when he saw how much Ryou was glowing.

"'Morning." Honda nodded.

Ryou suddenly took in that Honda was still in his clothing from the previous night, "Are you only now getting in?" he asked in surprise, "It is nearing six!" he gasped.

"Uh yeah. Sorry. I couldn't sleep." Honda scooted his chair so Ryou could see his leg, "I took a ride to clear my head and fell. Do you think you could clean me up?"

"Oh my! Honda, you must be more careful!" Ryou exclaimed, immediately falling to his knees before the other man and inspecting the wound. He returned to his feet and whisked off to the bathroom, "I shall be right back!" he announced from the hallway.

Honda suppressed laughter. There was nothing particularly humorous about the situation he was currently in. He simply felt the need to lighten the heavy burden that was burrowing deeper into his chest.

When Ryou returned, his arms were filled with first aid equipment. His cheeks were flushed as he dumped it all onto the bare table, "Ah... I need you to remove your pants so I can see the wound..." he knocked over a closed bottle of ointment and stumbled to pick it up, "... please."

Honda's face matched Ryou as the image of him against the counter came back to him. He cleared his throat and stood, "Yeah, s-sure." He slipped them past his knees, going carefully around his injury, and sat back down with them laying helplessly around his ankles.

Ryou, who had been busying himself with organizing the bandages, glanced over and squeaked. He coughed, "I apologize." he knelt down with a damp cotton ball, "This will sting." he warned, avoiding looking at Honda anywhere above the knee.

As he dabbed the bloody scrape, Honda hissed. It did burn, but not nearly as much as Kaiba's words. As Ryou continued to work, Honda thought deeply about the conversation he had had with the man only a few short hours ago. Before he could stop himself, he asked aloud, "Do you think I'm selfish?"

Ryou looked up, his brow knit together, "Pardon? No. I do not think that at all, Honda. Why do you ask?"

Honda sighed in relief. Ryou pulled away with cotton ball and began using a cloth to clean the caked on blood. He shrugged, "No reason. I just can't shake the feeling like I'm-"

"Did you know..." Ryou interrupted, "That when I was a young teen, I got in a fight with my father. 'I am grown up now, Father!' I had said, 'Stop treating me like a child!'" Ryou chuckled at the memory. His face quickly grew serious and he mumbled, "Sometimes, I would give anything to be a child again. Life can get too complicated too fast." He placed gauze on the clean cuts, "After the fight with my father, he had sent me to my room until I had calmed down. I remember sitting there and sulking. I know it was because I had spoken out of turn but all I had wanted was to be responsible for my own life." he wrapped bandage around Honda's leg as he smiled softly, "Even if it meant acting selfishly, I wanted my life to be mine. Do you understand what I mean?"

Honda nodded. He didn't think Ryou's story about teenage tantrums was anything like what he was going through. Still, he appreciated the effort. He looked down at his cleaned up leg and said, "Thanks, Ryou."

"Of course." He replied, slowly standing. He frowned and reached for Honda's hand. He examined Honda's thumb, "Looks like we have to wrap this up too. Goodness, Honda, did you want to lose it?"

Honda smiled sheepishly, "When I get stressed, I bite it."

"Stressed?" Ryou asked. He paused from cleaning the blood from Honda's wrist, "Did something happen?"

Honda pursed his lips, realizing he said too much. He shook his head and stood from the chair. He pulled his hand away from Ryou and stretched, "I'm gonna get some sleep. Thanks again, Man." and he left the kitchen with perhaps too swift a stride.

He didn't stop until he reached his bedroom door. Gingerly, he opened the door and slid inside. He found himself smiling as he saw Otogi balled up under the covers. The early morning light peeped through the windows and made his raven hair shine. Honda skillfully undressed and slipped under the blankets. It was so warm compared to the chilly rain that he'd be exposed to all night.

His presence stirred Otogi out of his dreams. The pile of blankets shifted to face Honda. One green eye squinted open, "H-honda?" he held back a yawn, "Did you just get home?" his voice was thick with sleep but it still carried the tone of surprise.

"Yeah." Honda's voice was soft. He leaned over to kiss Otogi's forehead, "Go back to sleep."

Otogi nodded sleepily and scooted over to Honda's awaiting arms. Though, as he went to wrap one of his legs around Honda, he felt the bandage against his bare skin. Suddenly very awake, he peered under the covers, "What is that? Are you hurt? Honda!" he sat up straight, looking horrified.

"I'm fine! I'm fine!" Honda protested, "Ryou took care of it!"

Otogi huffed, clutching onto the fluffy down duvet. He paused before smiling sweetly and nuzzled Honda in the chest, "Okay."

Subconsciously, Honda draped an arm over Otogi and laid beside him. He brushed away stray strands of hair away from his face. The heavy bass that had pounded in his ears all night was calming down and Honda was feeling the weight of his eyelids. He allowed himself to sink into the pillows and finally fall asleep.

It wasn't until after noon that Honda awoke. Naturally, the other side of the bed was empty. He sat up, wincing at how stiff his leg felt. He hobbled out of bed, threw a shirt over his head, and advanced into the hallway.

The shower was running in the bathroom across from his room. Honda had the urge to pee so he knocked and poked his head in, "Uh hello?" He was hoping it was Otogi. After living together for so long, they had become accustom to sharing the bathroom at the same time.

However, as Honda walked towards the toilet, he noticed there was a cat curled up on the seat. He gasped, his eyes darting from Ruby to the shower and back again. He couldn't swallow the lump that was in his throat and he thought his heart was going to jump out of the window.

The sound of the water stopping caused a shock through Honda's system. He raced for the door, but as his fingers grazed the handle, he heard the voice.

"You really need to stop spying on me, Honda. I'm going to get violent."

Honda kept his face turned away from the naked Bakura that stood before him. His face was scarlet, "I-I'm sorry! I had to piss!" he declared a little too loudly.

"So?" Bakura asked, rubbing his hair dry with a towel, "In Egypt, grown men took shits in the middle of the marketplace while reading the paper. Do what you must." he shrugged and took a moment to wipe his face dry.

Even with an invitation, the idea of being so _exposed_ in front of Bakura terrified Honda and he didn't think he would be able to relieve himself anyway. Instead he cleared his throat and said, "I can wait." He still wasn't looking in Bakura's direction.

Bakura chuckled darkly, "You're such a bashful little miss." He wrapped the towel around his waist and walked over toward the sink, "I think Ryou has thicker skin than you." He located his toothbrush and smeared paste on the bristles.

Honda frowned, "Hey! T-that's not fair! I can do it." He approached the toilet with reckless courage. Ruby gracefully leaped off the seat, curling up in the pile of Bakura's discarded clothing instead. Honda lifted the seat, pulled himself out from his underwear, and stood very still with his face scrunched up in total concentration.

Bakura paused with the toothbrush still in his mouth but his hands rested on his hips. He smirked as he watched Honda break a sweat. It felt like years had gone by until they both heard tiny trickles hit the water in the bowl.

Bakura nearly choked on his toothbrush in an attempt to not laugh. He pulled it from his mouth and spit out the foam while Honda relearned how to breathe. Bakura's dark eyes filled with tears as he laughed wholeheartedly. He pat Honda on the back and said, "Alright! Alright! I'll go!" he gasped for air, "I'd say we're even now." he opened the door and turned to snort at Honda's back, "You're a riot, Honda. I'll give you that." and he closed the door behind him, still sniggering.

Honda hung his head and exhaled loudly. He finished his business and made sure to wash his hands. After a quick teeth brushing, he also turned to depart from the washroom only to find that Ruby was looking up at him from her nest on the floor. Her tail flopped in lazy acknowledgment. Honda frowned, "What are _you_ looking at?" he puffed out his chest and ventured out into the hallway. If there was one thing about Honda, he was able to take punishment in stride.

A/N: LOL I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. I know it was mostly centered around Bakura x Ryou and interaction between Bakura and Honda but I needed to break up all the tension with some humor and citrus. Besides, it wouldn't be Honda if he wasn't awkward and blundering. I hope you enjoyed it!


	6. Mean Girls

Chapter Six – Mean Girls

Life moved slowly for the next couple of days. It took Honda until the end of the week to find a job stocking trucks by the docks. It was hard labor and Honda didn't really have the strength for it, but he enjoyed working with his hands. It was mind numbing and hardly anybody bothered him. The more exhausted he was when he returned to Ryou's the better. He never had to be alone with his thoughts for long for sleep quickly followed after dinner.

For the most part, his friends supported the profession. They were happy to see him not sulk around all day. However, Otogi moving back to Domino meant having more time at home and he had been hoping to spend it with Honda. Instead, they'd lay in bed and while attempted to make small talk, Honda was usually already dreaming.

Then, once the weekend had arrived, Honda found himself changing bedsheets with Otogi. There was something in the air that didn't sit right with Honda. So, naturally, he asked, "What's up?"

Otogi tucked in the corner with a sigh. He straightened his stance and faced Honda, "I've started seeing someone."

Honda's mind immediately flashed to the past few nights where the two had spent tangled up in each others limbs and stealing kisses. How Otogi had been hiding this from him with little change in behavior was horrifying. What else was he hiding?

Otogi sensed the confusion and continued, "No. Not like that. I'm seeing a therapist." his eyes darted away for a moment, "He specializes in grieving."

Honda surprised himself as he let out a sigh of relief. After all, had Otogi really been dating someone, it was none of his business. He shrugged and shimmied a pillow into a fresh case, "Good for you." he said sincerely.

"Yeah. Well, I was thinking..." Otogi paused, gripping one of his own arms as if he were squeezing the courage out of himself, "that you should come with me."

Honda threw the pillow onto the bed with more force than he meant, "No thanks."

Otogi protested, "Hear me out! He's really great and I've made a lot of progress already! You should come and see what it's like."

"I don't need _some random guy_ telling me how I should or shouldn't feel." Honda retaliated, "If he's working out for you, that's fine but it's not for me. I'm sorry."

"But-"

"Save it." and he left Otogi. He stomped down the stairs and into the back yard where he parked his rear on the steps, his scowl prominent on his face. "I know you're out here." Honda stated flatly.

Bakura seemed to have appeared from the shadows. He took a seat beside Honda and offered him a cigarette, "I'm going to start asking for payments if you keep using me for therapy."

Honda waved a hand in refusal to the cigarette. He groaned and hung his head, "You're right. You really _are_ my therapist." he ran his fingers though his hair, "Damnit." he muttered under his breath. He looked out into the yard, "Otogi asked me to go meet his. Something about grieving."

Bakura nodded thoughtfully, "Good."

"Huh?"

"You should go."

"Screw that!" Honda hollered, "What do I need that for? Some random stranger strutting in with his psychoanalyzing bullshit. Telling me he knows exactly what I'm going through and how it's okay to be upset. OF COURSE IT'S OKAY TO BE FUCKING UPSET! MY BEST FRIEND DI-" Honda crumbled and began to shake again, holding his face in his fists. He could never admit it to himself. He had heard Kaiba say it so plainly and yet he could not. He couldn't even utter his name.

"Pull yourself together." Baker advised, "I will not talk to you when you're like this." he scowled like there was a stench in the air. He clicked his tongue on the roof of his mouth, beckoning for Ruby to emerge from her hiding spot under the bushes. She bounded with elegance into Bakura's awaiting lap, where she immediately began to clean her paws.

Honda sat up straight though his fists were still shaking on his thighs. He cleared his throat, "I'm sorry."

"You should be." Bakura admitted, "Your selfishness is getting the best of you."

"I am not selfish." Honda bared his teeth. He knew that to be true now. Ryou's had said so himself.

"Oh like hell you aren't!" Bakura roared back, "You let your pride get in the way of everything around you. You can't even let the small stuff go because it's out of your control or it's not what you want. You're a stubborn ass. Trust me. Takes one to know one." he caught his breath and repeated, "You should go. You owe it to Otogi. Fuck, you owe it to all of us." he picked up Ruby and stormed into the house. As he left, he was ranting quietly. "...Bastard thinks living with him is a bloody picnic. I'd rather be skinned alive by a dulled blade..."

Honda smacked his forehead with his hands repetitively. He was completely unable to control his movements. It wasn't until Otogi had grabbed at his wrists and pulled them down that he was able to stop.

Otogi's eyes were overflowing with concern, "Are you alright?" he was knelt in front of Honda, stroking one of his hands with his own thumb.

Honda started shivering, "I-I'm sorry. I don't know what's going on anymore."

Otogi pulled Honda close so that his forehead rested onto his shoulder, "Shh." he cooed, "It'll be alright."

Honda kissed Otogi. He kissed him again. Then, before he knew it, he had pushed Otogi down into the grass, exploring the inside of his mouth with his tongue. He heard Otogi moan and took it as a sign to press on. He dug one hand into his ebony ponytail while the other crept under his shirt.

Otogi pulled away just as Honda had found a nipple. He gasped, "Honda! Honda, stop!" he crab walked away with wide eyes. His shoulders rose and fell while he tried to catch his breath.

Ashamed, Honda looked away, "I-"

"Don't." Otogi said flatly, "I don't want to hear it. You can apologize by coming to therapy with me tomorrow."

Honda nodded, not having much else to say. He closed his eyes as he felt Otogi breeze by him and back into the house. He winced as the door slammed. He rolled over onto his back on the porch, resting his head on his arms. He regretted putting the moves on Otogi. It wasn't that he didn't know about and he was certain he had feelings for him. Though, they felt different somehow. They weren't nearly as strong as how he felt about... about...

He sighed, watching the clouds float across the sky. He allowed his mind to drift. He thought of Shizuka. Her warm smile was always on her face. Honda wondered if she was smiling where she was. He hoped wherever she was, she was at least happy.

Honda heard the door open again. He glanced over to find Ryou's sitting beside him, enjoying the wind on his cheeks, "It is a little chilly today. You should be wearing something warmer."

Honda snorted at Ryou's attempt at making small talk. He sat up and rubbed his nose, "What's up?"

"Oh. Nothing." Ryou's answered, "I feel as if you and I have not spent much time together since you started your job." he smiled, "I suppose I am a little jealous that you talk more with my yami than me."

"Oh..." Honda felt another stab in his chest. He briefly wondered how many more he could take before his heart resembled a pin cushion. He placed a reassuring hand on Ryou. "I'm sorry you feel ignored. I don't mean nothing by it."

"Thank you." Ryou placed his hand over Honda's and gave it a squeeze, "You know how much I worry about you. I wanted to make sure you feel comfortable here."

"Yeah!" Honda blurted out, "O-of course I do! Staying here has been amazing! I can't thank you enough."

Ryou laughed, "Okay! Okay! I believe you. Calm down." he closed his eyes as another gust blew by.

They sat on the porch for the rest of the day. Ryou listened to Honda talk of his life in Tokyo. He spoke fondly of the flower shop. He found himself missing the old man and Midori. She had reminded him so much of Ryou. He wondered if he should call them, to let them know how he was doing.

"They sound lovely. I think calling them would be a polite gesture seeing as how they took such great care of you." Ryou commented. He stood, brushing the dirt off of his backside with his hands, "Well, I suppose it is time to get started on dinner."

Honda followed suit, raising his arms up to stretch his long torso, "Need a hand?"

Ryou beamed, "Sure! That sounds like a lot of fun."

They both traveled through the house laughing at silly jokes along the way. Though, as they came in view of the front door, their smiles had vanished. There was a man standing in the foyer among the unkempt pile of shoes. He wasn't very tall, standing with his hips to one side. Honda noticed that he had a fiery glare in his crimson eyes. Honda glanced over at Ryou and was surprised to see how uncomfortable he was. He broke the tension with a friendly, "Hey there, Yami." Ryou squeaked and lowered his head in the form of a greeting.

The pharaoh seemed to have no heard. Instead he nodded back at Ryou, "I apologize for letting myself in, Ryou. No one answered my knocking."

The pale boy gathered his wits enough to form words again. "That is quite alright." he mumbled, "Will you be staying for dinner?"

"No." Yami declined firmly, "Thank you." his gaze was back on Honda. The intensity made Honda squirm where he stood. He felt as if Death himself stood before him, but _why_? He had been in Domino for several days by now. Surely, if Yami had words, he would have come to see him sooner. Yami cleared his throat, refocusing Honda's mind. He commanded, "Please leave us, Ryou."

"Well that's nothing short of pretentious. Barking orders in someone else's home, eh Pharaoh?" Bakura has emerged from the stairs. Honda could see Otogi trailing only a step behind.

Yami Yugi scowled, "This has nothing to do with you, Thief. My business is with Honda alone."

Hearing his name made Honda even more confused. His eyes were spinning around the room, frantically searching for answers on anybody's faces. He threw his arms up in the air, crying out, "Will somebody tell me what the _hell_ is going on around here?"

"Very well." Yami said, his tongue in his cheek and looking sour, "An audience does not discourage me." he finally took a step from the foyer. He stood before Honda, whom had never felt so intimidated by a man so much smaller than him. His head was still swimming, trying to piece together why on earth this was happening.

Then, Yami spoke. His voice was harsh and low, "Stay away from Kaiba. He is not yours to play with anymore."

"_I have my company, my family, my _lover..._"_

It clicked.

Honda felt his chest get tight. He wasn't aware that he had his teeth bared, didn't feel his finger nails digging into his palms. He choked out his words, "I-I want _nothing_ to do with him. H-he's all yours."

"Don't take me for a fool." Yami looked ready for a fight. "You've done enough. Things have been just fine since you've left. I daresay it was better that way." he turned to leave, "Heed my warning, Honda. Next time, I won't be so kind." he nodded at the others in the room, who were frozen in disbelief. Yami had a smirk on his lips, "Good evening, my friends. Thank you for your time." and he departed into the young night.

When the front door clicked shut, Honda's limit hit the breaking point. His ears were pulsing, filled with a white noise that blocked out his friends' concerned voices. His mind went to that one night with Kaiba. He was laying in that fluffy king sized bed with the moonlight tickling his skin. Only now, it was Yami arching his back in pleasure where he once slept. Kaiba's body was on top of _him..._

Honda vomited onto the hard wood. Everyone else immediately sprung into action. Ryou raced into the kitchen for cleaning supplies. Bakura locked the front door, growling something under his breath, before helping Otogi relocate Honda to the living room couch.

Otogi's voice trembled, "H-Honda? Honda? Can you hear us?" His lip quivered as he waved a hand in front of Honda's almond eyes.

Bakura sneered, "That fucking pharaoh. Who the hell does he think he is?"

"A jealous new girlfriend." Ryou answered plainly. He handed Bakura bucket, "Did something happen that we are not aware of?"

Otogi and Bakura exchanged looks. Otogi shrugged, gently petting Honda's head. Bakura, however, sighed heavily. "He's catatonic." he nodded at Honda, "So, I suppose I should explain." he placed the bucket beside Honda and shoved his hands in his pocket, "Kaiba and Honda ran into each other a few nights ago."

Ryou and Otogi gasped, "No way!"

"Yes." Bakura confirmed. He said, "He told me about it, but I didn't know what the say. The meeting didn't go favorably for him."

Otogi put his hands on his hips, "It doesn't matter if anything happened or not. What matters is Honda's back in town and Yami feels threatened." he scoffed, "What a possessive bitch."

"That's the pharaoh." Bakura smirked.

Ryou shook his head, retreating to the hallway to clean the mess. His small voice carried well, "This is all so ridiculous. I cannot fathom any reason for such high school melodrama." Bakura and Otogi poked their heads around the corner, watching Ryou scrub the floor with a vigor they had never seen before. His knuckles were white as he gripped the sponge and even though the vomit was long taken off of the wood surface, he kept scrubbing. Bakura knelt down beside his other half and placed a hand on his shoulder, "Ryou..." he saw the smaller boy start to shudder in tears, "Crying will not solve anything. You must be strong for Honda. He needs you more than ever."

"You mean he needs _us_." Otogi crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame. He would occasionally glance back to check on Honda, who had passed out in either exhaustion or shock. He twirled his bangs out of nerves. "Bakura, he tells you more than either of us. Why do you think that is?"

Bakura stood, "What are you playing at?"

"Nothing!" Otogi held his hands up, "I'm just wondering." his tone got quiet as he looked at the ground. "Honda and I used to take on the world together. We were all each other had for so long, but, ever since he moved back..." he hugged himself tightly, "it's like I'm not even here."

Bakura rolled his eyes, "This is pathetic! I've had _enough_ of this." he stomped past Otogi, into the living room and over to Honda. Ryou and Otogi quickly followed, afraid of what Bakura would do next.

He straddled Honda on the couch, yanked him up by the collar of his shirt, and back handed him across the face. The shock caused Honda to cough, flailing his arms and gasping for air as if he had been underwater. He glared at Bakura, "What the-"

"Now you listen here!" Bakura roared, holding Honda up with both of his hands gripping the shirt, _"_You're going to stop whining and _be a man_! I am _done _with all of the pansy ass, pseudo-crisis _bullshit_!" Ryou whimpered at the volume of Bakura's voice but he dare not interrupt.

He continued, "The pharaoh is angry because he finds you to be a _threat_! It means Kaiba probably _still has feelings for you_!" Honda's eyes went wide at the realization. He looked over at Ryou to Otogi, whose expressions seemed to match his. Bakura smacked him again, "_LOOK. AT. ME_!" Honda immediately regretted following orders. Bakura was scarlet in the face. His mouth was frothy and his eyes were stabbing him deep inside of Honda.

The yami exclaimed, "I am not the kind of person to tell anybody what to do. Somehow, someway, you've made me give a damn so _don't fuck this up._" he shoved Honda onto the couch and stood up, "If you want him, _go get him_! You know where the hell to find him!" he paused to catch his breath. The room was filled with thick silence. Bakura sighed hard through his nose, "Honestly? The man is _irrelevant_. You have one standing right here who would treat you better. You're an _idiot_ and I cannot hold your hand like a little girl anymore." and he stormed out, making sure not to look anybody else in the face.

Honda laid on the couch, stunned. His hands were held up in frozen defense, as if he were expecting Bakura to come and pound him into a pulp. _He's right._ He thought. _I am a little girl. What is _wrong_ with me?_ He placed his hands over his face and screamed until he felt his throat was going to bleed. Ryou and Otogi stood together, closing their eyes as Honda's screams echoed through the room.

Then, the room stood very still. The only sounds were of Honda's panting, trying his best to catch his breath. It was after that, that Otogi and Ryou departed the room. Neither had anything to say for the time being. They left Honda with his endless thoughts, letting him get lost in the labyrinth that he had been spending months trying to escape.

Ruby strutted her way into the living room. Her ears perked at the presence of Honda in her spot. With one regal bound, she was up on Honda's lap. She circled his stomach several times before planting herself on top of him. He subconsciously began to pet her and stayed that way until he fell into a restless sleep.


End file.
